Life is so fragile. The events of the last few months have really taught me this. I have watched some very good people leave this mortal realm far too early and unexpectedly. I think the most important thing I have gleaned from this is that family is my number one priority, and I am going to do everything I can to make sure that my loved ones know that they mean the world to me. I would hate to regret an unkind word I had spoken, or to wish I had expressed more deeply or often my affection and gratitude to those around me. The thought of losing someone dear to me is unbearable, I cannot imagine how I would begin to deal with the grieving process if I thought that I would never see that person again. The one thing that gives me great comfort, particularly now as a mother who worries constantly about my little boy, is that this life is but a small glimmer in the eternities.
I do not preach very often, or at least I try not too. One of my many flaws is that I am scared of sharing my testimony with those who do not want to hear it, even though they may need it the very most. I wish I was more brave, and stronger, but I suppose that will come with more experience and more time. However, it would be selfish of me not to share my testimony on this principal, as I know there are so many around me who are struggling right now with loss, with heartache and with so many unanswered questions.
I know with every fiber of my being that families can be forever. Even more now as a mother I know this principal to be true. I have felt the smallest fragment of God's love in having a child, and it was overwhelming. I know that God lives, that his son Jesus Christ died for us. I would go to my grave testifying of these truths. Gods love is infinite and boundless, such a God would never break apart a family, that is why I know families are eternal. I know with my whole heart that Scott and I, if we work hard enough, can gain all of the blessings and gifts our Father in Heaven has to offer. I want so much for my son to stay strong in this church, I have witnessed personally the sadness and darkness that can fill a person's life, and the church is the way back into the light. It is the only true way to obtain lasting happiness. We live in a world where religion and family values are mocked at every turn, I myself once cringed at the idea of being "just a mother." But I love it, there is nothing better than being a mom, having this sweet little individual in my home, he is my everything, and I thank God everyday for the knowledge he has given me of eternal families, because if I were ever to lose this little boy, that would be the only principal that would keep me going. I witness to you that this is a true principal, it is as true and sure and real as the ground beneath our feet.
People will say this is a silly notion and that I am a silly person, there are so many in this world who ground all of their faith and humanity in laws of science and logic. It is so sad how great truths and beliefs get twisted, and how some of the smartest among us can be the most blind. It saddens me that so often religion and education seem to fight against each other like oil and water, when really they walk hand in hand.
I love this church, I know it is true, I promise that this is the everlasting gospel, that Jesus lives and loves each and every one of us. I know that families are forever, that this life is merely a test, a very hard and difficult test, but when we reach the other side and we are greeted with eternal happiness- these sour, twisted, horrible moments will fade away into the past, they will be a small pain compared to the joy and glory that await us. I cannot express how much I love this gospel, there are questions that I do not have answers for, there are things that I struggle with, but I cannot deny the testimony that I have been given, it is so strong and powerful that I cannot deny the existence of God, I cannot deny the existence of our Savior, and I cannot deny that the blessings and ordinances of the temple are real. They are very real. I hope if you do not have these same beliefs or knowledge of the truth that one day you can, because without them the world truly is not as bright or hopeful, most days it is the only thing that keeps me believing in good, in a hopeful and love filled future.
I love you so much my dear dear family, my dear friends- you are the only thing that matters in this life, every thing else is trivial. I try my best everyday to be the best mom, wife, sister, daughter, granddaughter, cousin and friend that I can be. I know I fall short in so many areas, and I hope you will all pardon me in this, I am trying my best, but my priorities have changed so so much in the last few months, and I hope that you can understand that what I do with my life and how I live my life is simply me trying my very best. I hope that when I take my last breath in this life I will feel like I did everything I could for those around me, that I leave with no regrets. I am trying my best to be that person, who never says an unkind word, or thinks an unkind thought. I am trying to live so that I give more than I receive, so that I love more than I am loved and so that I can touch more lives than have touched mine. I am working on being stronger, I am working on being braver and I promise you that I am doing so through this gospel.
Life is short, life is brief, there is so much beauty to be found, but you have to be in the right places and searching for the right things. Family is one of those beauties, and I am doing everything in my power to make sure that I have the best family in the world, one full of love and life and light- because I can promise you, Family is the only thing that lasts, and it is the only thing we get to take with us, but we do get to take it with us, and I thank God every day that families are forever.
Sunday, September 23, 2012
Wednesday, September 12, 2012
Lazy Sunday;s
AUGUST 2012
We had such a busy and full month! Here are some of our crazy happenings:
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We went to the fair on August 3rd and had such a fun time. There were so many different things to see. People had made large pictures/murals out of beans, corn, rock candy, etc. There were several different animal, vegetable, sewing, knitting, crocheting, etc, there were even cake entries. There were several different food vendors offering fantastic flavors and faire, we decided to have some dutch oven food for dinner- bbq chicken, green beans, potatoes and some peach cobbler to top it all off. Scott even got some Zeppis frozen ice, some of his favorite! Then we tried to go to the rodeo- it was such a great show, but we got rained out. We tried hiding under a blanket for a good half hour, but in the end we had to give up the good fight and rush to the car. We had Grayson bundled up real well, so he was dry, but the rest of us were completely soaked! Overall such a fun day, so glad we can have fun times such as these!
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This year at Cherry Hill we decided to host our very own summer olympics, hot off the heals of the London 2012 Summer Olympics- we had all kinds of events including sychronized swimming, 4-man blindfolded relay, rhythmic floor gymnastics and more! Everyone brought their A-game and we all had a blast whether it be participating, or watching those competing. We alsoo had a very fun Family Feud competition put together by Jason and Ashli- this years winners were the Grandparents, Coreys and Wilcocks. Everyone had a good time and we all cannot wait for next years fun!
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In August we spent a week with
Gigi and Papa in
California! One day we went to the San Diego Zoo and had so much fun seeing all of the different animals. Some of our favorite highlights included seeing the elephants, the hippo, the gorillas and the acrobatics show put on by some very talented performers. Grayson was such a happy boy and everyone was sure to comment on what a cutie he was- we had such a good day!
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...don't know when I'll be back again... Gigi and Papa were so sad to say goodbye to Grayson as he boarded his first plane ride ever. Grayson did O.K. on the flight, he was a bit upset but Mom and Dad did their best to keep him happy and boy were they pooped after the one and a half hour flight, but it sure beat a car ride! We flew Jet Blue, our favorite airline, and there were several other babies on board so Grayson was not the only one bothering the other passengers, so that made us feel better. It was a bit stormy in Salt Lake when we landed, but Great Grandpa Wilcock met us at the airport to take us home, and overall the entire flight was smooth and pleasant.Tuesday, July 17, 2012
Grayson and Harley
Friday, June 29, 2012
You're Right!
Stumbled upon a hilarious website: www.howitshouldhaveended.com- these guys take movies and create parody endings that actually make total sense. My favorite is this one, it is the Harry Potter parody- I actually thought about this scenario a few times myself- why didn't Hermione just use the time turner?! Other "how it should have ended" shorts that I liked and found particularly funny from these guys included: Dark Knight, Iron Man, X-Men first class, Twilight and Lord of the Rings. Enjoy, this makes for a quick short laugh to brighten your day!
Our little old man
Rubba Dub Dub Grayson sure loves the tub!
Bath times are a special occasion at our house! Grayson is always so cute and happy in the tub, Mommy and Daddy always fight over whose turn it is to bathe him. Grayson kicks his legs, waives his arms and makes big smiley faces during his baths, he will even calm down from a tantrum if he can hear the water running, because he knows his favorite part of the day is approaching. We try to give him a bath every night, but with our schedules being so crazy that isn't always the case- we try our best though!5 generations
As some of you may know, my Great Grandma Venna is still very much alive, she has the heart and mind of a 20-year-old and she still does many things that a person of that age and mindset would do. She lives on her own in a cute condo on the east side of SLC right up near Emigration Canyon, she goes to water aerobics 3x a week, drives her own car, etc. She is a hopping lady!
Grayson is her first Great-Great grandchild, and at Scotts Graduation party in May we were able to take this five generation picture:
This was very special, because I also have my own five-generation
picture taken with both of my sisters with Venna's mom, I am 4 years old
in this photograph:
Look at those two pictures, they are twenty years apart and Venna pretty much looks the same! Man that side of the family has awesome genes, I just hope I am lucky enough to have inherited some of them!
Grayson also got to meet a variety of other extended family members, and they all loved meeting him, he is such a popular guy being the only baby on both sides and the only baby into a lot of our extended family lines as well, we sure love him, and it seems to be contagious because everyone who meets him feels the same:
Grayson is her first Great-Great grandchild, and at Scotts Graduation party in May we were able to take this five generation picture:
Grayson also got to meet a variety of other extended family members, and they all loved meeting him, he is such a popular guy being the only baby on both sides and the only baby into a lot of our extended family lines as well, we sure love him, and it seems to be contagious because everyone who meets him feels the same:
Happy New Year
Okay, so I know it is not January, and we are actually just about halfway through the year, but I am going to break tradition and make my resolutions now, I figure since only half the year is left I have more chances of success, I am sure this will be a new trend, I am not sure why people haven't thought of this before.
First off, I want to be a better blogger. I have started creating a family yearbook with a program called BookSmart from Blurb(this is funny because I actually work for a company called BookSmarts Accounting) the program is awesome, so easy to work with and at the end you submit your finished product and they print you out a nice yearbook with a hardcover (the ones I have seen on pinterest look just like your high school yearbook, think nice and thick- colorful pictures- pretty layouts, etc.) Another nice feature of this app from Blurb is that you can import your blog directly into the book, so I want to renew my blogging efforts.
I think one of my reasons for past failure is Facebook, I post everything there instead of here. Granted it is super easy since my phone can upload anything in an instant, but I want to blog rather than book, so I am going to try harder. The plus side is I can import my blogs into my new yearbook, so it will help me keep in touch with everyone while also allowing me to accomplish this goal I have.
I have created about 30 pages of the yearbook already, and I am going to start transferring some of those over here for late blog posts of our year so far.
Happy New year- Wish me luck!
First off, I want to be a better blogger. I have started creating a family yearbook with a program called BookSmart from Blurb(this is funny because I actually work for a company called BookSmarts Accounting) the program is awesome, so easy to work with and at the end you submit your finished product and they print you out a nice yearbook with a hardcover (the ones I have seen on pinterest look just like your high school yearbook, think nice and thick- colorful pictures- pretty layouts, etc.) Another nice feature of this app from Blurb is that you can import your blog directly into the book, so I want to renew my blogging efforts.
I think one of my reasons for past failure is Facebook, I post everything there instead of here. Granted it is super easy since my phone can upload anything in an instant, but I want to blog rather than book, so I am going to try harder. The plus side is I can import my blogs into my new yearbook, so it will help me keep in touch with everyone while also allowing me to accomplish this goal I have.
I have created about 30 pages of the yearbook already, and I am going to start transferring some of those over here for late blog posts of our year so far.
Happy New year- Wish me luck!
Friday, March 30, 2012
Crunch Time Squared
4 weeks til baby gets here and 3 weeks til tax season is over- enough said?
I have been dying the last few days! The last two nights I have been up past 2 am and up before 9 am so that I can get work done for clients, and it is definitely taking a toll on my health, I keep asking Scott, "Am I a bad mother already?" I have been super bad about taking my stinky fish smelling pre-natals, I don't sleep nearly as much as I should, and I should probably be eating more as well, but my schedule just does not allow it. I sit down at the computer and six hours later find that I haven't eaten a thing all day yet. No baby in my arms and I already feel inadequate.
On the bright side, Grayson still manages to be perfectly healthy at my appointments, and despite my terrible malnourishment issue everything is weighing in fine, so I guess if anyone is starving it is me, not him, so that makes me feel a little bit better. I have had all the showers I am going to have until he gets here, my mom's family will throw one after he arrives and get me the last few things I need, but that shower isn't until 3 weeks after he is born, so I couldn't stop myself from buying a few items at TJ Maxx yesterday :)
Due to my hectic schedule I have not been able to write my thank you cards yet- the inadequacies just keep piling up, and we haven't even gotten to my church calling, my house work or my puppy. We are going to send Harley to California for the Summer to be with my parents and with her best friend- Miss Roxie. I know she will have a good time, and it will be best for everyone all around, but she is just starting to be a really good puppy, so it will be hard to see her go as well. It is easier knowing she will be very very happy there, and we will pick her up in August, so only a few months while we adjust to Grayson.
Getting Harley was one of the best things Scott and I did this year, I hope no one with kids gets offended when we tell them their toddlers are "Just like Harley!" but it is so true, Scott and I laugh and laugh at these kids because they literally have about 90% compatibility when it comes to mannerisms and attitude as our 6 month old puppy. I babysat a friends one year old the other day and she got into everything, just like Harley, wanted to destroy a few things, just like Harley, wanted to eat everything off the floor, just like Harley, I had to clean up her poop, just like Harley- I mean c'mon people, dogs are perfect training for children, particularly puppies. I have really come to develop a laid back manner about my stuff, I have had several shoes, socks, a rug, etc destroyed by my dog, and I have gotten to the point where I just don't care about many things, and if she has a cardboard box and is working on tearing it to shreds, I just let her go to town because it is a worthless item and if it keeps her occupied for 2 hours while causing me only 5 minutes of clean up later then the trade off is totally worth it.
Wish me luck the next few weeks, I still feel pretty good, despite my lack of sleep, I having gained a total of 25 pounds, so still mobile and still able to bend over, although I prefer more of a squat position these days to pick things up. It is scary and awesome at the same time that in a month at most I am going to be an official mommy- I try not to think about the delivery process and just remind myself that there is this tiny little human inside me who has to get out somehow, and how excited I am to see what he looks like, kiss those tiny feet that have been kicking me persistently the last few months, and marvel at what my best friend and I have created to love and nurture, and tease in Scott's case.
I have been dying the last few days! The last two nights I have been up past 2 am and up before 9 am so that I can get work done for clients, and it is definitely taking a toll on my health, I keep asking Scott, "Am I a bad mother already?" I have been super bad about taking my stinky fish smelling pre-natals, I don't sleep nearly as much as I should, and I should probably be eating more as well, but my schedule just does not allow it. I sit down at the computer and six hours later find that I haven't eaten a thing all day yet. No baby in my arms and I already feel inadequate.
On the bright side, Grayson still manages to be perfectly healthy at my appointments, and despite my terrible malnourishment issue everything is weighing in fine, so I guess if anyone is starving it is me, not him, so that makes me feel a little bit better. I have had all the showers I am going to have until he gets here, my mom's family will throw one after he arrives and get me the last few things I need, but that shower isn't until 3 weeks after he is born, so I couldn't stop myself from buying a few items at TJ Maxx yesterday :)
Due to my hectic schedule I have not been able to write my thank you cards yet- the inadequacies just keep piling up, and we haven't even gotten to my church calling, my house work or my puppy. We are going to send Harley to California for the Summer to be with my parents and with her best friend- Miss Roxie. I know she will have a good time, and it will be best for everyone all around, but she is just starting to be a really good puppy, so it will be hard to see her go as well. It is easier knowing she will be very very happy there, and we will pick her up in August, so only a few months while we adjust to Grayson.
Getting Harley was one of the best things Scott and I did this year, I hope no one with kids gets offended when we tell them their toddlers are "Just like Harley!" but it is so true, Scott and I laugh and laugh at these kids because they literally have about 90% compatibility when it comes to mannerisms and attitude as our 6 month old puppy. I babysat a friends one year old the other day and she got into everything, just like Harley, wanted to destroy a few things, just like Harley, wanted to eat everything off the floor, just like Harley, I had to clean up her poop, just like Harley- I mean c'mon people, dogs are perfect training for children, particularly puppies. I have really come to develop a laid back manner about my stuff, I have had several shoes, socks, a rug, etc destroyed by my dog, and I have gotten to the point where I just don't care about many things, and if she has a cardboard box and is working on tearing it to shreds, I just let her go to town because it is a worthless item and if it keeps her occupied for 2 hours while causing me only 5 minutes of clean up later then the trade off is totally worth it.
Wish me luck the next few weeks, I still feel pretty good, despite my lack of sleep, I having gained a total of 25 pounds, so still mobile and still able to bend over, although I prefer more of a squat position these days to pick things up. It is scary and awesome at the same time that in a month at most I am going to be an official mommy- I try not to think about the delivery process and just remind myself that there is this tiny little human inside me who has to get out somehow, and how excited I am to see what he looks like, kiss those tiny feet that have been kicking me persistently the last few months, and marvel at what my best friend and I have created to love and nurture, and tease in Scott's case.
Friday, February 17, 2012
Rambling, Gambling and Vegas
Lets get the rambling out of the way, these are things that have been on my mind:
I also did a lot of research for this trip reading the 2012 travel guides for Vegas, and while the TI buffet is still not the talk of the town, it seems they have made some improvements, so my pregnant self is very excited for a night of gluttony.
We also got a $50 dining credit with our gift card, so we have to decide between the other TI restaurants where we want to go but I think we narrowed it down to either a steak house or mexican food.
Other than that we plan on relaxing relaxing relaxing. Oh and $50 each to gamble as we please. Since I lose my money no matter what I play, I am going to head to the place with the most excitement and the place where my money will last the longest- the cheap slots! I always look at that $50 as an additional hotel fee, and then I don't feel so bad losing my money, but when in Vegas, you have to do a little Vegas, and you never know when you might actually win something, and that prospect makes it exciting. I figure if I get up to $100 I will take my winnings and call things good.
Getting bigger in my middle areas, but nowhere else, I think my butt may be sagging a little these days but Scott denies any such thing. For Valentines day the stake had a dinner and dance, and I danced for 1.5 hours straight, which made me really proud because I have not had much exercise this pregnancy, and I was still able to shake it pretty decently without getting winded, so maybe things wont be so bad for me after all.
Scott and I are narrowing down our choices on treadmills and should have one picked out by the end of the month, so once we get that I am going to try to walk an hour each day as they say it helps with labor and helps the baby come sooner rather than later, and since he is due during finals/graduation time, I figure the more help I can give him to come sooner, the better. As long as he doesn't come too soon, that is. Grayson, this is your mommy, please just come around 37-38 weeks, that would rock.
- Realistically in as little as 7 weeks I could be a mother- kind of scary.
- I never appreciated how skinny I was until I got pregnant, my goal is to get back to relatively the same size and love myself even more.
- Something to be proud of though, I have been able to rock pretty much the same size small pregnancy clothes through my entire pregnancy, have not made any purchases since the first trimester- yeah me.
- Next week I go to more frequent Dr.'s visits, so definitely getting close
- Last night I had a dream that I had Grayson, and it went just fine, didn't even hurt that much- was this a prophetic vision or wishful thinking?
- Just purchased a baby sling, love it, a little girly, but what baby items aren't a little girly? Plus, I want as many unisex items as I can get my hands on so that I can use the same things with all my babies.
I also did a lot of research for this trip reading the 2012 travel guides for Vegas, and while the TI buffet is still not the talk of the town, it seems they have made some improvements, so my pregnant self is very excited for a night of gluttony.
We also got a $50 dining credit with our gift card, so we have to decide between the other TI restaurants where we want to go but I think we narrowed it down to either a steak house or mexican food.
Other than that we plan on relaxing relaxing relaxing. Oh and $50 each to gamble as we please. Since I lose my money no matter what I play, I am going to head to the place with the most excitement and the place where my money will last the longest- the cheap slots! I always look at that $50 as an additional hotel fee, and then I don't feel so bad losing my money, but when in Vegas, you have to do a little Vegas, and you never know when you might actually win something, and that prospect makes it exciting. I figure if I get up to $100 I will take my winnings and call things good.
Getting bigger in my middle areas, but nowhere else, I think my butt may be sagging a little these days but Scott denies any such thing. For Valentines day the stake had a dinner and dance, and I danced for 1.5 hours straight, which made me really proud because I have not had much exercise this pregnancy, and I was still able to shake it pretty decently without getting winded, so maybe things wont be so bad for me after all.
Scott and I are narrowing down our choices on treadmills and should have one picked out by the end of the month, so once we get that I am going to try to walk an hour each day as they say it helps with labor and helps the baby come sooner rather than later, and since he is due during finals/graduation time, I figure the more help I can give him to come sooner, the better. As long as he doesn't come too soon, that is. Grayson, this is your mommy, please just come around 37-38 weeks, that would rock.
Monday, January 30, 2012
Worst Blogger Ever- it is official
Well, I did warn you when I started this new blog I would be completely awful, and I am.
We are having a boy, named Grayson, incase you are very much out of the loop. Lately I have been getting the nursery all sorted, and I have made a blanket, three pillows, a name sign and am halfway through crocheting a grey and white rug. I purchase a rocking chair that I love and an orange ottoman that opens up for extra storage.
Ashli moved home to California, so if we can get a new basement tenant during the summer, Scott and I will move upstairs and occupy the two rooms with the shared Jack and Jill bath and Grayson will officially have his own room. We will keep him by our bed in a little bassinet or something of the sort for the first few months when feeding comes every three hours, but after that he can have his own space (Lucky).
Feeling good, have my next appointment on Thursday- so far so good, no hiccups or concerns, baby boy has been healthy so keep your fingers crossed for another good appointment.
A few stats:
We are 27 weeks pregnant and Grayson weighs roughly 2 lbs and is over one foot long.
Mommy looks about the same as she did at Christmas time, but apparently has a uterus the size of a basketball....
To date I have gained 15 lbs, so still have lots of room to grow, but right on target for a healthy pregnancy. My back is starting to hurt a little bit more and it is getting harder to get in and out of bed, but for what some people go through I really cannot complain.
Scott and I head on our babymoon over Presidents Break, after the crazy month of January I am very much looking forward to a break :)
We are having a boy, named Grayson, incase you are very much out of the loop. Lately I have been getting the nursery all sorted, and I have made a blanket, three pillows, a name sign and am halfway through crocheting a grey and white rug. I purchase a rocking chair that I love and an orange ottoman that opens up for extra storage.
Ashli moved home to California, so if we can get a new basement tenant during the summer, Scott and I will move upstairs and occupy the two rooms with the shared Jack and Jill bath and Grayson will officially have his own room. We will keep him by our bed in a little bassinet or something of the sort for the first few months when feeding comes every three hours, but after that he can have his own space (Lucky).
Feeling good, have my next appointment on Thursday- so far so good, no hiccups or concerns, baby boy has been healthy so keep your fingers crossed for another good appointment.
A few stats:
We are 27 weeks pregnant and Grayson weighs roughly 2 lbs and is over one foot long.
Mommy looks about the same as she did at Christmas time, but apparently has a uterus the size of a basketball....
To date I have gained 15 lbs, so still have lots of room to grow, but right on target for a healthy pregnancy. My back is starting to hurt a little bit more and it is getting harder to get in and out of bed, but for what some people go through I really cannot complain.
Scott and I head on our babymoon over Presidents Break, after the crazy month of January I am very much looking forward to a break :)
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